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The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to People Twitter@sh.itjust.works · 9 months ago

Shopping in bulk

lemmy.world

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Shopping in bulk

lemmy.world

The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to People Twitter@sh.itjust.works · 9 months ago
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  • TheMightyCanuck@sh.itjust.works
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    9 months ago

    If it’s the uline jumbo rolls my work gets… Please don’t.

    Your asshole will thank me

    • SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      You just gotta keep using it until your anus naturally builds up callouses.

      • TheMightyCanuck@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        I rarely physically shudder from text

      • bobs_monkey@lemm.ee
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        9 months ago

        I too try to only shit on company time

        • BlanketsWithSmallpox@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          They’re called union shits around here. Even if you’re not in one lol.

          Also combine shitty to with expensive bidet. Best of both worlds.

      • SynopsisTantilize@lemm.ee
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        9 months ago

        My wife keeps telling me that…

        • ZoopZeZoop@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Why? What is she planning for your anus that requires callouses? You should inquire. That sounds suspicious!

          • SynopsisTantilize@lemm.ee
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            9 months ago

            Just know that she won’t answer and I’m scared.

            • ZoopZeZoop@lemmy.world
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              9 months ago

              Do you need us to call someone for you?

          • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
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            9 months ago

            Sounds exciting!

      • RoquetteQueen@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        If you don’t use a bidet, your butthole is already calloused. I learned this the first time I pooped in a normal toilet after getting my bidet.

      • Zoidsberg@lemmy.ca
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        9 months ago

        I think this is the worst thing I’ve ever read

        • cryptiod137@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

        • SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Thank you, and you’re welcome.

      • Empricorn@feddit.nl
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        9 months ago

        What a terrible day to have eyes.

    • waz@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Is it the high gloss stuff, or the 80 grit option?

    • henfredemars@infosec.pub
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      9 months ago

      Does it flake like a French pastry?

      • cocobean@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        I only wipe my ass with croissants to keep my cheeks buttery smooth

        • Nfamwap@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          I’m fairly certain those words have never been uttered in that order in the entirety of human history. Bravo.

          • Fermion@feddit.nl
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            9 months ago

            Nor should they ever again.

            • bobs_monkey@lemm.ee
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              9 months ago

              It’s a terrible day for Canada, and therefore the world

      • ZoopZeZoop@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        The toilet paper or his asscheeks?

    • Transporter Room 3@startrek.websiteBanned
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      9 months ago

      My old work ordered everything from uline, and I started bringing in my own TP specifically because of how awful it is to use that tissue paper.

      Legitimately feels like tissue paper that people stuff gift bags with.

      But at the same time, almost slippery.

      And you WILL know if you creased the paper the wrong way, because it WILL stab at you with the force of ten thousand teeny tiny needles.

    • BarbecueCowboy@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Plus side, it’s basically impossible to clog your toilet with that stuff. It’s effectively pipe grease.

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