“I find the most erotic part of a woman is the boobies.”
Remember Kif: the fastest way to a woman’s bed is through her parents. Have sex with them and you’re in.
If i said you have a nice body would you take off your clothes and do a little dance?
“I am no longer infected!”
Bouncy bouncy
If you throw some money at me I would
Well at least there’s something we can all agree on.
Relevant last place comic:
“Hi, I’m Gabe”
Idk why but censoring R*ddit is way funnier than it should be
Oh it’s reddit? I thought it was censoring out a name of a planet.
Huh I thought it’s a country name.
Given the image, I first thought it was a sci-fi planet.
It makes it funnier because it implies that earth women are a dead end for this gamer
I prefer Re***t
It’s the most ****it sentence over ever read
Maybe start by not referring to them as ‘females’ or talking about ‘luring’ them to your room
He calls it his lair.
*dungeon
**fungeon
TIL: there is such a thing as a stupid question.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
“You should smile more. You’d be a lot prettier”
No clue, but I would start by not referring to them as females, just a hunch.
I heard that showing her how unfair it is that just because you are nice no one wants to sleep with you, is the best way to make her sleep with you out of obvious obligation to your nice personality and unjust fate
Also in this context being weird and shy counts as nice. You don’t actually have to make any effort!
And you simply must begin and end every sentence with uWu, obviously.
Well maybe they’ve gotten enough nice points they can turn them in for one sex?
Of course! They showered last week and everything!
I used to know one who would go for “here’s $100”, though that was many many years ago and I don’t know if she still lives that kind of life. I haven’t kept up with anyone from high-school, much less friends of friends.
You don’t have to say anything, just show them the sweet skills you’ve developed while studying the blade.
“$3 million/year, 1 night/week.”
~150,000/night is a hefty cost.
To betray one’s own heart in the interest of profit, such a cost is fair.
ever been married?
Han shot first
John Madden. Football.
“plus sized”
There’s one in the Austin Powers movies with a funny scottish accent.
I don’t think he’s not a gamer tho. “Dead sexy” funny guy nonetheless.
I believe his pick up line was: “Listen missy, do you fancy another go? Because once you’ve had fat you never go back.”
He had other lines the ladies love like:
“First things first. Where’s your shitter?! I’ve got a turtle head poking out!”
Fat Bastard?