The largest host for Minecraft mods is Curseforge, which hosts effectively all Minecraft mods. They intend for you to download mods and modpacks through their ad-infested launcher, and part of the ad revenue is used to pay the mod creator per-download. However, there was an alternate open-source launcher, MultiMC, that used the Curseforge API to download mods without having to see ads. Even aside from that, MultiMC was better than Curseforge in effectively every way.

Some time ago, Curseforge announced plans to step up the ads on their launcher even more and block MultiMC from using their API to try to force users to use their launcher. This sparked a lot of backlash because their launcher was obviously much worse than MultiMC. Modrinth had been around before this, but it gained a lot of popularity in the wake of this incident because people wanted to move away from Curseforge. Modrinth was open-source and allowed mods to be downloaded through MultiMC, which gave people the impression that it was more trustworthy than Curseforge.

However, they had promised from the start that they would have payments to mod creators as well through “ethical ads” on their website. This is a problem for them because their userbase (both mod creators and players) is mostly made of people angry at Curseforge, and thus more likely to be free/open-source software enthusiasts and anti-advertising. That being said, their website is still a lot nicer than Curseforge and they don’t push ads as aggressively.

Because Modrinth is still relatively small and payments to mod creators only started recently, the vast majority of mods are still only available on Curseforge. However, Curseforge’s protection measures were pretty easily bypassed and PrismMC (the successor to MultiMC) is capable of downloading off Curseforge anyways.

E can do a lot of things but it doesn’t really make you “physically a woman”. It can change your moods (and overall psychology if you let it) to a slight degree, your appetite/metabolism, muscle/fat growth and by extension your physical appearance

I guess that what I meant by that is that there are some major draws to HRT, but I’m scared that some of the effects might go further than what I wanted. Like, having less facial/body hair is something I want for sure, but I don’t know if I’d be entirely comfortable if I had a lot of breast growth. I’d want to have a bit of an androgynous/twink-ish figure compared to an average woman. But I’m also worried that if I don’t start HRT then my body will start changing in ways I don’t like. I know it’s an old adage, but I’m pretty young now and I feel like there are some physical qualities I like about myself that I would lose if I wait too long.

This is a legitimate concern, yeah…you might have to test the legitimacy EEOC at times. Some companies will be chill about it but you can generally sus this out in the interview process because they will act positively but a bit squirrely if they genuinely want to work with you. If they maintain the fake-nice facade all the way through they will weasel out of their responsibilities the moment you become inconvenient. That’s just kind of the reality of being us.

One of the idle fantasies that I’ve had is to get to the point where I can pass as either male or female based on how I dress or style my hair. I would present as an effeminate guy for the next few years my work life and only dress up fem for friends. But as of right now, I don’t have any to go out with IRL, and am I really going to get dressed up to stay home and play video games? IDK.

This kind of rhetoric is so common among questioning people who eventually come out that a lot of people would just start calling you an egg at this point. Society puts so much pressure on people to conform to cis-normative ideals that when you start to question them you really can’t pinpoint when exactly you stopped believing in them. Some of the most binary fem-presenting transwomen out there spent their early 20s as muscle bros trying to run away from femininity. Some of us end up being gamer dorks but slightly softer. Some are EDM composers or roboticists or welders who flip off the patriarchy when it questions why they don’t build their personality around gucci handbags (not that it’s wrong to like tradfem stuff, but the point is we shouldn’t put femininity in a box and sell it. Cis women even have many routes of expressing themselves).

IDK, I want to try clothes that look more feminine, but the kinds of clothes I like are more towards the androgynous end. I’m not sure how to describe what I like; I don’t want to be too girly girl but “tomboy” and “butch” aren’t quite the right way to label it either. Like, generally I just imagine long-sleeved shirts and pants, which is what I wear right now. I know that clothes made for women generally look subtly different, but at the same time I’m worried that those subtle differences will be hard to see with the way my body is now. I always get anxious about spending money and I don’t want to buy stuff that I end up not liking.

The road to living authentically under capitalism is inherently risky. So, as you’re aware, it’s imperative that you treat each decision you make with care and respect. But to live in paralysis will not allow you to discover who you really are. We’re not just talking about a costume that you wear around to put on a show for others. What we’re asking here is who are you? Who is nightshade? Is it worth risking your life to become you? Is it worth risking you to continue as you are?

The part where I struggle with this idea is that I feel that under capitalism, living inauthentically is necessary to some degree anyways. I’m not really openly about my beliefs IRL; while most of the people I interact with in person aren’t outright awful to be around, there’s still the occasional attack helicopter joke or dumb political comment and I don’t have it in me to argue about it (I know my beliefs should require me to confront people more often but I’m too much of a coward). When I speak with people I’m not friendly with, I generally feel like I’m just reading off a script to get through the conversation. Especially in the work life example; if I’m expected to pretend I don’t find capitalism abhorrent for 40 hours a week anyways, is it really that much worse to pretend one more thing to avoid discrimination? I don’t want to put on a show for other people all of the time, but sometimes I feel like I could put up with doing that part of the time to avoid trouble. I wish that I was more brave, but there’s already so many things to worry about, and the idea of adding the pressures from being trans or being a girl on top of that seems daunting.

I’ve been thinking about gender issues for a while and I don’t know what to do about it. It’s something I think about a lot and there’s a lot of other things tied into it which are hard to untangle.

I starting having these kinds of feelings about 3 years ago. I was hanging out in generally left-wing/LGBT-friendly online spaces before that, so I knew what trans people were, but I only really started having these feelings myself when COVID hit. I’ve always been relatively physically androgynous/feminine for an AMAB person, but even so I’ve been wishing that I was more feminine. I don’t feel a huge incongruity with the way my body is, and sometimes when I look/dress particularly androgynous I actually kind of like the way I look. That being said, I’ve still been noticing that I have more facial/body hair compared to a few years ago (along with other subtle things I can’t quite name) and I really do not like that, and I’m really worried about further changes like that. I feel like it’s going to be hard to achieve/maintain the level of femininity I want without medically transitioning, but I’m not entirely comfortable with being physically a woman either.

In general, I act pretty much like the stereotypical “socially-awkward male nerd”, and while that isn’t a particularly “masculine” social role, I also sometimes wish to be perceived as more feminine in this regard. When I’m with people I’m close with, I generally act cool and sometimes sarcastic. I tease people a lot (in a friendly way, though I wasn’t always good at controlling that) and I’m good at verbally sparring when they make fun of me back. But sometimes I want to act cutesy or be more openly affectionate, and I can’t because I feel too vulnerable doing so. This makes me feel like I’m too cold and too closed off if I want to be feminine, (though IDK if it’s great to think that because it’s kind of buying into gender roles).

The only person that I really trust that I’ve spoken to recently is an online friend who’s a cishet guy (well, we’ve met in person but we live far enough apart that it’s not super convenient), and he’s supportive but it’s not really something he knows how to help with. I’ve also talked about this with another online friend who is queer, but I haven’t spoken to them a while (we drifted apart a bit due to circumstances in their life). I haven’t told anyone IRL and it takes a long time for me to really trust people, so I basically don’t have anyone to support me IRL. I don’t think my parents are outright hateful, but I don’t think they really understand LGBT stuff either, so I really want to be sure before I tell them anything. I’m also looking to work as a programmer, and I’m uneasy with presenting as not-male in my work life.

I’ve read through a bunch of the commonly linked trans resources but I still haven’t really done anything about it. I live in one of the less awful states; there are informed consent clinics near me and I have enough money for that, so I feel like I’m fortunate compared to a lot of trans people. I’ve had some idle dreams about buying some feminine clothes, but I’m too lazy? scared? to even try that. I’m not sure if I’m that uncomfortable with my body or if I really want to be a woman that badly compared to the stories I’ve read. I’m worried that it’s not a real feeling because I can’t really recall any signs more than 3 years back. I’m unhappy in my life but there are a lot of reasons for that aside from (possibly) being trans. One part of me is scared of waiting too long to start transitioning, but another part of me is scared of having to learn to live as a trans person (or even just as not-male) in an increasingly fascist United States. I feel like I have to make a decision relatively soon, and it’s just completely paralyzing.

There’s a lot of other things I want to say but I’m not sure if this is coherent as is so IDK.