grym [she/her, comrade/them]

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  • 93 Comments
Joined 5 years ago
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Cake day: July 26th, 2020

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  • Yea i basically have stopped using any specific site/thing for discovery. I just kinda look around when I fancy, hear something somewhere and find it, check out the discography of that band, look into what people also like, etc. I don’t rely on algorithms basically. Maybe the emails I get from bandcamp sometimes based on stuff i’ve already bought or groups/people I already follow.

    The downside is that since I don’t even listen to radio or follow specific influencers/recommendations, I feel like a weird hermit, I don’t really know of an artist or their music unless i’ve randomly come across them, even extremely popular stuff everyone’s heard about. But it’s no big deal, I still find plenty of cool things.




  • I don’t know you personally but what you’re describing is very familiar, and its very likely that your brain is being an asshole and partially maintaining you in a state where everything seems impossible and endless and horrible. Its a lie, at least part of it is. You can do it, you’ll look back and be happy you stayed strong, I swear to you !

    One step at a time. Having more space for yourself. Finding other people to open up to, putting on a few clothes in your room, doing things secretely first so you can do them openly later. Its a fight, but you’re a fighter. Don’t let those who make you suffer win, take your time, and try to find others that can help!


  • I’ve been there, with those same thoughts. It sucks. The thing it was always there burning quietly, so you couldn’t have kept going forever without knowing either, it was eating at you slowly. Now you just know about it. I know it feels like you fucked up or you wish it would stop, I do too tbh, but it gets better the more you slowly, surely, move towards your goals and live your life as yourself. It will take time, and the changes (not even talking about hrt here) will be gradual.

    Hang in there, and if your situation is currently too dangerous or unstable its also okay to focus on things other than hrt. But hrt will also work very gradually, and not everyone gets the quick relief from dysphoria.

    I know it seems impossible and overwhelming but remind yourself many have been there and are there with you, you’ll be OK if you hang in there!