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The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to People Twitter@sh.itjust.works · 1 year ago

This is a major Life Pro Tip

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This is a major Life Pro Tip

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The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to People Twitter@sh.itjust.works · 1 year ago
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  • Socsa@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    My wife, to this day, shuts off the shower and then immediately steps out while water is still running off her soaking wet body, inevitably creating a puddle in the bathroom.

    “Honey, why don’t you drip for like five seconds, or even grab the towel and give yourself a quick dab before you get out?”

    The first time I told her this she just stared at me for a solid 20s while her brain rebooted. But then her “never admit anything ever under any circumstances” instinct kicked in and she responded “wow are you really policing my shower habits?”

    So anyway, now she knows better, but still does it because marriage is about compromise, or something.

    • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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      1 year ago

      I give myself knife hands over my body before going for the towel. Towel stays significantly more dry and I can use it several times before it needs a wash.

      • WhoIsTheDrizzle@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I got ridiculed for doing this by my partner. I do it very quickly and vigorously, it just makes a ton of sense to me; I end up being dry faster and more efficiently than going straight to the towel.

        • acockworkorange@mander.xyz
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          1 year ago

          Sometimes it’s okay to tell your partner to go fuck themselves.

          • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            Just give them a vibrator/fleshlight, same message but more constructive.

      • Lev_Astov@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I can use it several times before it needs a wash.

        Look at this guy over here, washing his towels.

        • Scubus@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          This is it, my least favorite comment chain today

        • brbposting@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          alt-text: relevant Dilbert

        • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          That’s how you fuck up your towel mushroom harvest.

      • A_Very_Big_Fan@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        The good ol’ hand squeegee

      • odelik
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        1 year ago

        I just shake like a dog for a good 10 seconds.

      • orphiebaby@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        I’ve done this for years!

      • merc@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        Why does your towel need to be washed more often if it gets wetter?

        The water coming off your body is pretty clean (you just showered).

        • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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          1 year ago

          Things like to grow on wet stuff. Even if you’re clean, wet towels will start to grow things and get an odor. The quicker the towel gets dry the quicker it doesn’t grow stuff.

          • merc@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            IMO it matters more how long it has been since you last washed it, not how wet it was. It also depends a lot more on the climate. A wet and humid client will be worse than a house with central heating in the winter, where things are notoriously dry.

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      I squeegee my whole body with my hands before stepping out

      • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago

        I call it knife hands.

      • Amazinghorse@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Me too! No pools of water on the floor, no wet towel after 1 shower.

      • RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Me too. At least my head if not everything.

    • Daxtron2@startrek.website
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      1 year ago

      It’s a good thing she’s not single, I would hate being in a relationship with your wife!

      • cone_zombie@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Thank you for your service, OP

      • Chriszz@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Anyone whose first instinct is to get defensive when offered good faith advice… yeah keep em away from me

        • fine_sandy_bottom@discuss.tchncs.de
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          1 year ago

          Yeah but this guy could be a controlling asshole who follows her around all day laying down “life hacks”.

          We just don’t know.

    • state_electrician@discuss.tchncs.de
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      1 year ago

      I dry myself completely while still in the shower and it’s a mystery to me why not everybody is doing this.

      • shuzuko@midwest.social
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        1 year ago

        Because sometimes I leave the towel hanging on the door hook :')

        • RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Ok? And?

          • brbposting@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            🚿 🧖‍♂️🚪

            • RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              deleted by creator

              • brbposting@sh.itjust.works
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                1 year ago

                Think dripping all over the floor the farther the towel is from the shower :)

    • Robert7301201@slrpnk.net
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      1 year ago

      Am I the only one who lays a towel out on the floor in front of the shower? This thread has me thinking what I thought was standard practice might not be.

      • OrangeJoe@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Yes, because other people have bath mats…

        • Death_Equity@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Which you then need to keep clean and replace. Using a towel is smarter, but some people just love putting unnecessary rugs everywhere.

      • fine_sandy_bottom@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago
        • Hang towel over shower screen.
        • Shower.
        • Turn off water.
        • Wipe water off body.
        • Towel dry.
    • RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      A (very smart and educated) girlfriend once told me it was so smart how I actually dry off my body with the towel instead of just wrap myself and wait for myself to dry naturally. We only have 4 limbs.

    • aivoton@sopuli.xyz
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      1 year ago

      G7gyvcfuh vgyufdgvggg ggy

      • Nikki@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        me too

      • ArmokGoB@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 year ago

        • TheSilverShroud@sh.itjust.works
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          Excellent username! I needed a reminder that losing is Fun™️ this morning.

          • ArmokGoB@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    • popemichael@lemmy.sdf.org
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      1 year ago

      She reminds me of my 3rd ex wife.

    • GBU_28@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      “I am dumbass, quit soaking the bathroom.”

    • BrotherL0v3@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Oh shit, I do that too! Never occurred to me to stand there and drip for a minute. 😅

    • Illuminostro@lemmy.world
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      deleted by creator

    • ArmokGoB@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      1 year ago

      I do this out of habit

    • chuckleslord@lemmy.world
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      That’s a really shitty way to talk about your partner. Is this supposed to be funny or something? I’m neurodivergent and can’t tell

      • kraftpudding@lemmy.world
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        Yep, has a humorous tone for sure. Don’t worry, this guy doesn’t hate his wife.

        • KevonLooney@lemm.ee
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          If anything, this guy is describing a healthy relationship. You don’t have to have a discussion where you share your heart and feelings about every issue. That’s exhausting having to learn and grow all the time.

          Imagine a friend that you joke around and are comfortable with. You would say “fuck you, I’ll drip wherever I want. You’re just mad because you have no drip.” That’s a healthy relationship.

          • mossy_@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            At the same time, sometimes it’s good to say “yeah, your way might be better.” Of course, I’m single, so take my comment with a grain of salt.

          • Riven@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            Lul damn that’s a good comeback at the end there.

          • rockerface 🇺🇦@lemm.ee
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            That’s best friend energy alright. Or, perhaps, a loving sibling energy

            • dohpaz42@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              Only in Kentucky and Alabama.

            • MadBob@feddit.nl
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              1 year ago

              Minus the witnessing eachother dry off after a shower.

      • GBU_28@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        This comment has it all. This is Lemmy.

        • chuckleslord@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Ya know what? I was getting a bit frustrated by the reaction to this, but this genuinely brightened my night. I… don’t get people sometimes, but I do enjoy this place.

      • braxy29@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        someone can totally love their partner and still find some of the stuff they do infuriating.

        also my oldest kid did this. it’s infuriating! (but i love him.)

      • h3rm17@sh.itjust.works
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        Sure, that’s exactly what your comment history seems to imply. You are not using it as an excuse at all (even if you are)

      • CbtB@lemmynsfw.com
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        Really shitty? This is mildly shitty at worst IMO.

        • chuckleslord@lemmy.world
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          Fair enough

      • lemmyvore@feddit.nl
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        Bashing your partner is a really popular form of humor, unfortunately. The older sitcoms for example are full of it. It gets appreciated not because it’s great humor but because it’s a form of coping with the issues, for both the one making the joke and the ones laughing.

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