Like most other people here, I originally came here from reddit. Ive been having a blast so far, and I much prefer the forum-style of this. After about a week of using Lemmy I realized there was something intrinsic to reddit that Lemmy doesnt have. And I wont miss it. Too many people on reddit were way too horny. I was really annoying, but Lemmy seems way more chill. Plus its refreshing knowing that the people on here arent all bots.

    • Gur814@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      Agreed. To help prevent this we should all send at least a few bucks a month to keep this project running.

  • Veraticus@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    Especially as a gay guy, seeing massively upvoted posts of a woman holding basically anything (but she’s wearing a low-cut top!!!) got pretty exhausting.

          • FlanFlinger@lemmy.ml
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            1 year ago

            Not so much the classic car sub, that was mostly folks arguing about what defines a classic car, or folks reminiscing about thier first cars.

    • BeardedSingleMalt@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      I’ll never forgot how absolutely bonkers r/CablePorn went over this. Top posts all-time were of some truly gorgeous masterful cable-work in server rooms, colorful coordination, gore-to-porn jobs of jumbled mess to near works-of-art. Then some mildly attractive girl posts herself pointing to a comparatively meh small cabling setup it went into meltdown while also becoming one of the top posts at the time.

    • Ko'vari@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      Trust me, as a hetero woman, I got so exhausted too. Reddit got so eye-roll-y within…less than 5 minutes sometimes that it made me just leave and go do something productive.

    • Bilb!@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      I’m gay too. I don’t really understand what this post is about. Your complaint is seeing someone you’re not attracted to? That can’t be right. There has to be something I’m missing.

      • flying_gerbil@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        At least for me, I feel the same way (despite liking women) because I disliked seeing something that was relatively low quality get upvoted purely because of sex appeal. Hell, there’s even a whole sub dedicated to the idea that people just paid attention to the sex appeal, only to be surprised that the content itself was really cool

        https://www.reddit.com/r/UNBGBBIIVCHIDCTIICBG/ Upvoted Not Because Girl, But Because It Is Very Cool; However, I Do Concede That I Initially Clicked Because Girl.

        • kofe@lemmy.ml
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          1 year ago

          I don’t mind the initial posts but when the comments are all “nipples” or something it reinforces what I’ve told my partner: I hate going out in public knowing anyone could take a picture of me and find any reason to sexualize or harass me, just for existing:/

    • rockettaco37@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      As an asexual, that always was a bit uncomfortable. And don’t even get me started on the bots always sending dms. Damn things never stopped. xD

    • StrahdVonZarovich@beehaw.orgOP
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      1 year ago

      I remember finding a great subreddit called r/CharacterArt (or something like that). You could post character art mainly focused on dnd and other ttrpgs. I thought that was a great idea, and checked it out to find some cool art for my own Pathfinder game.

      90% of the top post were women in revealing clothing.

  • Jeze3D.exe v0.0.5@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    Trust me; they’re coming. As a borderline asexual person I’d want nothing more than a non horny refuge, but that will never exist. Humans are far far too horned up to allow for that.

    • FartsWithAnAccent@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Why not just make or join an ACE community? I don’t have any links handy, but I know I saw at least one searching through places to subscribe to.

    • Spellblade@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I’m bisexual myself but I hope they can at least not let things turn into what askreddit turned into with the near constant sexual questions.

    • Vilian@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      i think we are a lot safer, with instances that completely block nsfw, they gonna gather in the more open instances

    • SharkEatingBreakfast@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      I’m asexual, through & through. It’s understandable that sex / sexual content is inevitable in such a wide open space, but on R×ddit, it’s become absolutely constant and inescapable! To the point where non-sexual things are being sexualized, and it’s just become genuinely unnerving and gross.

      I want to stop seeing posts commenting on everyday objects and being like “Damn, I’d fuck that!”, as if anyone truly wanted to know that. Ever. Ick.

      • Scrumpf_Dabogy@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        It’s pretty eye opening to read this. As someone with a fairly high sex drive, I live every day with my body constantly demanding I have sex. It’s not a difficult urge to keep in check, but it is pretty constant.

        I think the humor you’re talking about stems from that constant battle. No one (well someone, but not most people) would actually have sex with whatever inanimate object is being posted. Its just making light of that constant urge most of us face.

        But I totally get how that could sound disgusting if you don’t share that experience. I will try to keep that in mind for the aces out there.

        • SharkEatingBreakfast@beehaw.org
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          1 year ago

          I appreciate your thoughtfulness.

          Do note, though, that there are aces who don’t mind sexual discussions or comments. The only connecting factor between the label is that we do not experience sexual attraction, nor do we desire to have sex.

          Some aces break it down further into preferences when it comes to sexual discussion: sex-neutral, sex-averse, and sex-repulsed. Sex-positive is there, too, as some aces have no issues discussing it, but that often gives the impression/misinterpretation that there are aces who desire sex, which is obviously an oxymoron.

          Lastly, the asexual community is actually very very very small. Like, ridiculously so. The chances of you running across an ace-identifying person is a fraction of a percent, so don’t worry too much about tiptoeing to cater to our subsect (although I very much appreciate the sentiment)!

  • Silviecat44@vlemmy.net
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    1 year ago

    I am waiting for some NSFW communities/instances to be created. It has the addition of attracting new users as well.

    • DracEULA@beehaw.org
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      Hoping they don’t come with a deluge of OnlyFans spam. Reddit had some good niche NSFW subs, but they got watered down with generic content. The same stuff gets posted to every sub, with a mad libbed title to fit the kink. Their profiles are just a hundred of the same picture, titled Would you _____ a ______ or Am I too ____ for ____?

      I think the worst offender was a ginger who made it to the top of HotArabGirls or something.

    • spezspezspaz@vlemmy.net
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      1 year ago

      Same, I feel like there isn’t any niche content here yet, but I’m less than an hour in so I’m still kinda looking for the light switch

    • myfaceistupid@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      Sorting by all/hot, you can come across some nsfw communities, although some of them seem really shady.

  • GrouchyLady@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Some of the subreddits could be great, but some could also be really mean and unwelcoming. So far it seems much more friendly here, and I hope that’s not just the honeymoon period.

    • scifu@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      It is. The bad comes with the good. If we want more user migration then it’s only about time.

    • BeardedSingleMalt@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      Part of that came from the same 3 questions being asked every 5 hours from new people. I’m not necessarily condoning or justifying it, but it did get rather annoying in r/Deadpool when every day there were 4 new posts saying “Hey, I’m new to Deadpool, what’s a good place to start reading/catching up?” despite the first item on the sidebar and FAQ was where to start and the big bold letters on a new post screen was “READ THE FAQ”.

      Alternatively, I stayed away from other subs like 1911 because if it wasn’t a Springfield, Colt, or $1400 custom job you got berated and told to “save more money”

  • linuxpng@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    The thing I like the most is that I don’t have to scroll through lines of people making jokes to get to the actual discussion or insightful commentary on the topic. Even though there is less happening here, it is definitely more. I honestly can’t see going back to reddit.

    • DracEULA@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      I don’t mind good jokes, but Reddit has standard “inside jokes” that are posted to almost every thread. That and the endless quotes from television shows. I like Arrested Development too, but god damn can we just have a conversation without asking how much one banana costs?

      • zaktmt@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        Very much this. There is the same jokes that pop up over and over and over again. It gets repetitive.

      • Wistful@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago

        Is that even avoidable? It’s the low effort type of joke that will get you upvotes every time, and because of that, people will always reuse them.

        • JohannesOliver@beehaw.org
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          1 year ago

          “Karma” and the gamification of it make it worthwhile to do whatever gets you those upvotes. I like that Lemmy votes stay attached to the specific post or comment without it giving an overall score for the user. I also really like that the scores can be hidden by the user entirely.

          • Wistful@discuss.tchncs.de
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            1 year ago

            Is “karma” system completely bad? If someone has bad reputation (based on karma) it can be used to quickly figure out if they are troll account for example.

            • JohannesOliver@beehaw.org
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              1 year ago

              Potentially. It also might just mean they post, or posted one time, things that go against the commonly held groupthink.

              I don’t think a reputation system is bad necessarily, however I think Reddit is well aware that the one they created results in many users chasing that carrot, and people take the scores very seriously. You see evidence all the time with “downvotes, really?” or “of course my most upvoted comment is”. The dopamine hit and avoidance of downvotes (or ability to punish wrong-thinkers with them) help create some of the echo chamber.

              A reputation system could easily be based on a global ratio and labels for example, but it would be less addictive. I am on an instance that doesn’t even have downvotes, and I like that, and I still hide scores, so my concern for identifying trolls through a points system versus the things they say isn’t all that high.

              • Wistful@discuss.tchncs.de
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                1 year ago

                That’s a good point, it is a flawed system in that sense, but it definitely incentivizes people to interact and post more, which is in turn a good for the platform getting more content, I guess.
                I’m excited to see how Lemmy’s system is going to work out, and/or if it evolves, and what kind of community will it end up “creating”.

        • mobyduck648@beehaw.org
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          1 year ago

          I ended up sticking to UK versions of the big subreddits towards the end partially for this reason and partially because I only really follow American politics beyond the surface level when it’s geopolitically relevant to the UK so I wouldn’t have a clue what was going on in some threads. Nothing against American pop culture or anything (I’d be massive hypocrite, I’m a deadhead and that’s got to be one of the most quintessentially American bands) but it gets a bit too much when it’s 24/7 and most of the comments sometimes.

          I like to think the Fediverse ought to naturally be more internationalist since it’s not fundamentally an organ of the American ad industry but I guess we’ll see in the years to come. Either way I much prefer the vibe here in general, it’s way more chill and not an angry place like Reddit has become.

    • Cuddly Cactus@lemmy.world
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      Oh god I got so tired of the jokes. In the beginning I liked to see them peppered in here and there, and I love a good pun, but it just became so overdone and forced. Every thread was just lines and lines and lines of jokes (many of them weren’t even good) with no actual conversation. It got boring.

      • mangel@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        AnarchyChess somehow seemingly flooding the site in the last week or two, good lord. Every single time, “holy hell” etc. So old, so quickly.

    • plum@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      The pessimistic Internet user in me knows we are in the honeymoon stage of a wonderful user base.

      • Klinkertinlegs@beehaw.org
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        Yeah, I just encountered my first “average redditor” on here, but it was just one account among many great ones, so it’s still good for now, but the trolls will come.

  • Grizzzlay@beehaw.org
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    1 year ago

    Another thing I appreciate here is the lack of ragebait. It’s more common in video sharing platforms (which Reddit keeps stumbling over itself trying to become) where you have people deliberately making awful food recipes or doing something completely nonsensical for the sole purpose of clicks and engagement.

    Social media in its current state is focused on pissing people off. Twitter and Reddit making decisions to kneecap themselves for the sake of lofty ideals is the best thing that’s happened to the Internet in recent memory.

    • thumbtack@beehaw.org
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      1 year ago

      YES this so so much. reddit tends to be way too full of ragebait, horny comments, and extremist echo chambers. i’ve had enough with it all!

    • Ko'vari@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      This is particularly why I don’t participate in any social media aside from (what used to be reddit but now) lemmy. It got to the point where I wasn’t even enjoying reddit, I just clicked it out of habit. And did I actually retain anything useful from that website? Lol no. It was all just timewasting bullshit that put you in a pissy mood.

      It’s nice to actually hold a fucking conversation for once. I think a lot of us came here for the same reason; missing the community of that old school forum feel.

      • Grizzzlay@beehaw.org
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        Yeah, after years of being in that swirling bowl of timewasting, contrarian opinionating, and all that bad faith nonsense, I agree. I actually agree. Man, this is like the Digimon fan forums back in the ProBoards days, haha!

    • Infinitybiscuit@beehaw.org
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      100% this. My mood levels have been way more stable since I deleted Reddit. I think the forum based media here also only attracts people willing to contribute more than just a sensational picture or video.

      • PascalPistachios@beehaw.org
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        1 year ago

        Saaame. But I like it when it’s genuinely bad. Not just some tiktok of some content farm adding cheese to cheese to cheese.

  • sailsperson@beehaw.org
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    Something similar drove me off 4chan’d /b/ back in the day. At some point, it became absolutely not random, but simply dedicated to various porn - porn that surely had their own board, which made me even more confused as to why post it in a place that is specifically made for basically uncategorised content that shouldn’t fit anywhere else.

    • BeardedSingleMalt@beehaw.org
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      Part of that for me was when /b/ because flooded with social-threads to the point they had to make /soc/ just to get them out

  • BeardedSingleMalt@beehaw.org
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    I’m hoping it won’t happen here but the endless shoehorning about how every single little problem anyone under the age of 40 encounters is because of fUcKiNg BoOmErS, and how anyone under the age of 40 is the most oppressed group of people in the history of time.