WASHINGTON—According to the results of a new poll released Thursday by the Pew Research Center, the majority of Americans would swap democracy for a $100 Best Buy gift card. “Our research found that 72% of Americans would agree to give up all free and fair elections in the U.S. forever in exchange for a $100 certificate they could use to purchase a new Bluetooth speaker or couple Keurig coffee makers,” said Pew pollster Dana Felder, who noted that an overwhelming 90% of Americans stated that they would eagerly surrender their First Amendment rights without a second thought for a chance to rummage the bin of discounted DVDs and Blu-rays at the front of the store. “Sixty-five percent of the survey respondents stated that they would choose to live in an autocracy as long as they received free shipping, and another 55% of Americans responded that they would gladly abandon democracy for as little as a 15% off coupon from Bed, Bath, & Beyond. The remaining 28% of Americans who said they would not swap democracy stated they would only do so for a gift certificate to a nice local bakery.” At press time, Felder confirmed that the results were the highest they’d been since 1996 when 80% of Americans stated that they would live under an Islamic theocracy in exchange for a $50 gift card to Radio Shack.
  • talEnglish
    281·
    8 days ago

    a $100 certificate they could use to purchase a new Bluetooth speaker or couple Keurig coffee makers,” said Pew pollster Dana Felder, who

    I do not for one minute believe that $100 is buying a couple of Keurig coffee makers, unless those guys are going ridiculously hard on the razor-and-blades model.

    checks Amazon

    Yeah. The least-expensive Keurig coffee maker on Amazon is $60:

    https://www.amazon.com/Keurig-K-Mini-Single-Serve-Coffee/dp/B07GV2S1GS

    It looks like they go up to $126.

    Maybe a couple of Mr. Coffee coffeemakers.

    • parad0x22@midwest.socialEnglish
      23·
      8 days ago

      This article was first posted in 2021 and has not been edited since. Inflation has been considerable in that time.

    • MangoCats@feddit.itEnglish
      3·
      7 days ago

      I do not for one minute believe that $100 is buying a couple of Keurig coffee makers

      It’s not, these are the promises, like cheap eggs, affordable groceries and $1.98/gallon gasoline.

    • shalafi@lemmy.worldEnglish
      2·
      8 days ago

      My ex and I scored 5 at the thrift for $5 each. I’ll never understand paying retail, and especially for coffee makers. I did pay “full” price for my Amazon French press. Whatever.