It seems like the only logical option. If someone paid me to come up with a solution to having poopy butt I couldn’t come up with a better one than a hose or a bidet. You know what I wouldn’t do? I WOULDN’T INVENT PAPER YOU COULD RUB ON YOUR BUTT.
Like every person that has tried a bidet on the internet describes their experience as being reborn. Anyone that tries it instantly becomes a shill for big bidet. I have not seen a single negative review for a bidet aside from maybe water shooting up your back which is more of a skill issue with aiming.
There is some debate to be had between using a bidet versus using a hose. With bidet there’s no hand contact but you can’t control where the water goes. Im personally more in favor of hose since you still gotta flush and handle the bathroom door so there’s gonna be contact either way, but using water is CLEARLY superior to toilet paper.
Water is cheaper and guess what? IT USES LESS CLEAN WATER THAN MAKING TOILET PAPER. That’s right making a single tissue of TP uses more water than just simply washing your butt. You can also shower less frequently because you don’t constantly smell like shit. We are deforesting jungles just to turn them into butt napkins that do not even clean us properly, they just smear the shit all over the crack and make us smell like poop.
Also without TP there’s no longer an issue with assholes flushing their used TP down the toilet and clogging the pipes, houses will no longer get TP’ed, the pandemic scalping situation wouldn’t have happened etc etc. So why are people still hellbent on using this inferior method?
After I learned to wash my ass I realised it didn’t itch almost ever and then had the horrifying realization
Yep no poopy butt = no itching.
Enjoy your arse hose, francophile.
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Most of them are valid I don’t want to deny other people’s experience.
I’ve had extreme culture shock when I went to Indonesia. Both the unsanitary conditions of their squat holes and the hoses or cups they use sitting in pools of stagnant water in a country notorius for malaria and mosquitoes used to both wash shit and shower with. The whole “wet room” concept when part of my job is to grow pathogens like Ecoli. Just saw everyone’s shit germs everywhere and had a few days of mild panic attacks. Not to mention trying to keep my clothes dry in thise things and seperate shoes and
Then how do people do that without getting their clothes all soaking wet?
Fast Forward after the shock
wears off, I’ll shower bidet and still theres shit that sticks and then is now in the shower in a drain that isn’t a power flush. Which grows germs and doesn’t go down properly.My hybrid solution is to wet some TP to clean the area and then follow up with some lotion or mineral oil wipes until it’s clean. Paper just doesn’t do a full job. Then get your shit germ sprayer thing (bidet arm) that gets shit on and aprayed with shit crossed my mind, but our water is COLD and how do you keep it clean?
Every description online is like very vauge and overly modest in using a bidet and I just need something explict step by step.
Unsanitary bathrooms are straight from hell. It’s genuinely disgusting. It’s usually the remote bathrooms in rural roads that are really gross and dirty. I’m sorry you had to experience that.
Then how do people do that without getting their clothes all soaking wet?
In squatting holes they usually have a low pressure shower bidet or a container just pouring water on it and then they scrub it with their hands. It gets your hand dirty but it gets the job done with minimum splashing.
Every description online is like very vauge and overly modest in using a bidet and I just need something explict step by step.
I’m not sure how much it helps but wikihow has a guide.
Thanks cabbage
Generally hygiene is taught by your mom/dad or primary caretaker and somewhat by your primary school. So if no one ever mentions that to you, you’re probably not going to think about it, and even hearing about it is going to seem somewhat alien.
Generally hygiene is taught by your mom/dad or primary caretaker
It reminds me of the poop knife. Now I wonder what poop knife habits I have that no one else does.
exactly… i’ve wondered the same… but afaik I don’t have any
lmao we have an insult for europeans which translates to “butt unwasher” (or کون نشور). y’all have the permission to use it.
Is that Persian or Arabic? And can you transliterate please LMFAO. I love this.
it’s Persian. technically it transliterates to butt unwasher the translation would be “someone that doesn’t wash their butt”.
EDIT: sry i misunderstood it’s koon nashoor or kun nashur.
Unlike translate, transliterate means to convert from one writing system to another. The user is asking you how you write that in latin letters, probably so they can have some idea at all about how to pronounce it.
oh right i thought it meant translating word by word as opposed to translating to the target language. it’s koon nashoor or kun nashur.
That would be to calque!
A calque is when a term is translated word by word into a new language. And a loan word is when a word or words are directly taken as-is. In fact, this means that loanword (from German lehnwort) is a calque, while calque (from French) is a loanword :D
cool i’ll remember it for the next time.
This is going on some protest signs for sure, thank you comrade
if it gets a quarter popular as cracker then that would be excellent.
Clean my ass with water?!? Absolutely not. Fish fuck in water.Gatorade is more refreshing and hydrating.
id go as far as saying buttholes crave it at this point. they cant just go back to water.
Gatorade tastes so shit it honestly belongs in waste water.
Hexbear is back
It never left.
“They don’t want to be great people” - Shah Jahan
Currently reading this with the bidet on and water blasting up my ass as I rock back and forth to get every nook and cranny of my butt
Hell yeah clean ass gang
Rise up!
I do the jiggle too
I need an AI powered bidet that can recognize my butthole and where poop is, then utilizes machine learning to algorithmically anticipate where my ass will be most doodoo in the future.
I personally just shit into my hand and cram it into my eurethra
Not my comrade.
eurethra
the canadian toilet paper lobby has controlled every major political and media figure since 1900 in the west, to ensure the steady consumption of their product. where do these massive profits go? nobody knows, but some suspect the canadians are building a weapon underground in north sasketchewan
We are simply not civilised enough for that kind of advanced plumbing.
Also, won’t somebody think of the poor landlords who would have to pay for installing the bidets.
First thing i did in my apartment was buy a bidet, took 3 minutes to hook up.
In my home country there’s a separate bidet station you move to and wash your booty
In my utopia, there will be no landlords but all the bidet that a comrade could need.
Uh actually we did have bidets in the past so it’s not about why getting them is hard it’s about why the fuck did we stop
I just gotta say I’m really confused by the “you don’t need TP” angle of bidet shilling, like I am a bidet user and a bidet shill but I still have to use several pieces of multi-ply TP to dry off down there, and sometimes need to wipe extra to get what the bidet missed despite my 30 seconds of ass-wriggling.
I’ve been in the bidet gang for 13 years, but I do not understand the no-tp bidet people.
Not only for drying after, but I usually use tp before the bidet as well. If I don’t, I’m blasting poo everywhere in my crotch area.
sometimes need to wipe extra to get what the bidet missed
That’s why I prefer bidet shower that way it doesn’t miss. If you are using the bidet to only wash your asshole then there’s no need for drying but I understand that people may want to dry. This is more of an anti-wiping post rather than anti-TP post I think I lost the plot after the second sentence but we can live in a world where the majority wash their ass and there’s still TP left for people that really want it.
comrade, if you’re just washing your anus and nowhere else with the bidet, then proceeding to not wipe at all, congratulations, you’ve simply relocated some of the shit to other parts of your crack.
I’ll make sure that the area is clean then wait a little bit so that it drys out then leave. If I could somehow pin point target the water straight into my anus and nowhere else I might as well go get an enema.
but like… why not do a quick wipe to get the residual shit? bidet alone is almost as gross as wiping alone, imo.
There isn’t usually any residual shit left but you can still wipe if you want it’ll still use way less TP than wiping.
I think they mean shit-water gets everywhere
Different per bidet and person but in my experience it doesn’t.
