Especially when most cishet women I’ve had sex with were teenagers and the average lesbian is 23-35
- Lesbians are terrible at making the first move and chasing/initiating/escalating.“Useless lesbian” stereotype
Just as bad as cishet women so I still end up 99% having to do the chasing/escalating since I’m better at it and more willing to do so. It makes things feel gendered af and so, so dysphoric. I’m at the point where I honestly never want to do it ever again
- The shyness is incredibly bad
I’ve had multiple women flirt with me first (and express explicit interest in kissing/hooking up) and when I escalate to kiss them, they start giggling, pull back, and keep saying how nervous/shy they are. I then have to help calm them down and wait for 5-10 minutes until they can pull themselves together. Tangentially, also met an incredible amount of bisexual women who said that they’ve never done anything with a woman before because they’re too shy to flirt with women
- Stroke game is pretty bad
I’m just comparing to myself and other trans women here. Just less experience I guess
- Head game is worse
Probably just also lack of experience. Hard to blame them on this given how most of their dating pool don’t have dicks
- Too soft and respectful?
This is probably just a personal preference I guess. But the sex now is very methodical, soft, slow. Vs before where it was much more primal, instinctual, and intense
Doesn’t apply to trans women or bisexuals in my experience
- Worse at flirting
So many lesbians just straight up tell/ask me they wanna kiss/have sex/whatever. It’s all incredibly explicit and direct. Which I understand for consent reasons, clear communication, etc. But the sexual tension of subtle flirting and the playful back and forth is something I miss so much
Sorry for the cishet-ignorance I’m gonna show with this question, but I got confused about what trans-lesbian means? Is that like OP, a trans femme into women? Or a trans man into women?
Also just generally, I have no idea about what the sexual component of lesbian interaction plays out like, but socially at least I’ve met a ton of lesbians that outwardly appear very confident and aggressive, but I think they’re what you would say were more on the butch or or more male-coded side of the lesbian spectrum (not necessarily in appearance, but just like attitude , possibly into sports, very “one of the guys” type vibe.) But in any case I always assumed they’d be pretty aggro about sex, they talked about it all the time haha.
I cracked up at your “how dinosaurs dated” bit.
The first one. A lesbian who is a trans woman is a trans lesbian.
As opposed to trans men who are into women but still consider themselves culturally lesbian, which is also a kind of person that exists.
Ohhhh ok that makes total sense, thanks for enlightening me.