I mean, some people just rub other people the wrong way. Like with cats and dogs. Cultural differences, aesthetics, body language and the reflexive responses, natural aversions… they all play a role in a first impression.
Politeness is about getting past those initial impulses and giving one another an opportunity to prove they’re more than what they appear at first blush. And about dampening your own eccentricities so as not to startle or offend inadvertently. But politeness is a learned skill, while reflexive responses are innate. People make whole careers out of diplomacy and decorum. You shouldn’t feel bad if you fumble it occasionally and you should be willing to give others an opportunity to redefine themselves if they come off clumsy or inept.
I mean, some people just rub other people the wrong way. Like with cats and dogs. Cultural differences, aesthetics, body language and the reflexive responses, natural aversions… they all play a role in a first impression.
Politeness is about getting past those initial impulses and giving one another an opportunity to prove they’re more than what they appear at first blush. And about dampening your own eccentricities so as not to startle or offend inadvertently. But politeness is a learned skill, while reflexive responses are innate. People make whole careers out of diplomacy and decorum. You shouldn’t feel bad if you fumble it occasionally and you should be willing to give others an opportunity to redefine themselves if they come off clumsy or inept.