Redditism 1: “It’s the internet. You are allowed to swear.” 
I hate when some very grown-ass adult says that because someone didn’t cuss enough for their taste. I swear all the time in my posts here but I still find that shit really, really tryhard and it seems more immature than not saying the naughty word to me.
Redditism 2: Ending a rebuke with a question mark when it’s not a question to make it sound extra snippy.
I’ve heard this being compared to a “vocal fry” and maybe it is, and coming from CA, vocal fries were often said out loud as a form of subtle hostility toward people perceived as lessers, such as retail and restaurant workers. If you need an example of what I’m talking about, it usually goes something like this:
Poster: “I think (opinion).” 
Redditism enjoyer: “You’re wrong?” 
Redditism 3: “Do you need help? Who hurt you? Help is available if you need it, buddy!” 
This one is the worst one I can think of right now because it contaminates even the very possibility of showing sincere care and concern for someone else. It comes loaded with the implication that the person that was “hurt” or “needs help” is fundamentally wrong and should shut up. Fuck that ableist shit, forever. 
I don’t know why, but “this is the way” bothers the fuck out of me. Might as well clap like a seal and go “THIS”.
It’s “THIS”,
edition thoDon’t you criticize Glup Shitto. He’s the key to the whole thing!
The (person pointing up) “THIS” that i hate the most.
I saw the thing and I clapped!
“Hey Redditor”
RED WEDDING 
“I don’t know what a red wedding is, but i do like Billy Idol’s White Wedding.”
RED(DITOR) WEDDING
“this is the way” bothers the fuck out of me. Might as well clap like a seal and go “THIS”.
Alright, let’s try…
47:4 When you meet the disbelievers in battle, strike them in the neck, and once they are defeated, bind any captives firmly — later you can release them by grace or ransom — until the toils of war have ended.
☝️ THIS!! ☝️
Allah could have defeated them Himself if He had willed, but His purpose is to test some of you by means of others.
…I’m gonna be honest with you, I don’t think it hits quite the same.
Generic ass joke
Edit: didn’t think this would blow up
Edit 2: thanks for the gold kind stranger
“I AM GOING TO BE DOWNVOTED FOR THIS, BUT” (very brave upvoting bait)
(…) is bad, actually
Someone posted a Shinzo Abe death meme on twitter, then came the ‘Making fun of someone’s death is bad, actually’ civility lib
spoiler
lmao I just got this tagline
“[thing] is [bad/good], actually” is a pretty good stilted sardonic line, especially for making fun of libs. Good things are bad, actually. Bad things are good, actually. Actively sabotaging yourself and trying to collaborate with your ontologically evil opposition is just smart political strategy, actually.
It’s just so awkward and bad it really just brings the rest of it together.
@Civility@hexbear.net posting mandates are just the internet version of anti-bullying rules that are mastered and exploited by bullies almost immediately.
😔
Had a bunch of shitlibs on instagram posting about how we should care about trump’s assassination attempt. Called one of them out on it and she reported me lmao
I just generally wish Reddit would die. And everything associated with it. Fuck Reddit forever.
yeah also im really digging this hybrid forum-style thing we are developing into
It’s not solely a reddit ism and I’m not immune from doing similar things but when it’s just the same tired jokes over and over in reply to articles or whatever.
Like say it’s an article about Russia doing anything and invariably there’s a homophobic joke about Trump and Putin being gay together. Again and again. Over and over. Like watching a train pass by where every car looks the same.
Yeah, that shit is dreadfully common in offline conversation too.
I can handle in-jokes and even traditional cliches (Hexbear has its own for sure) but I hate when something horrid and hateful is normalized and repeated like “dae Putler and Drumpf gay amirite” or even just normalization cognitohazards like “Anne Frankly I did nazi that coming”
I did nazi that coming.
That quip is so old, worn out, and predictable that I audibly moan in annoyance when I see it.
Isn’t it like a refurbished joke from Hogan’s Heroes? “I know nazing!” Which would make the joke about 60 years old.
I do not understand how people enjoy r*ddit “humor.” It’s the same jokes non-stop. They will beat a dead horse years after it died. Almost every “joke” discussion turns into:
- References to The Office
- References to The Sopranos
- Attack helicopter copy pasta “did you assume my ____?”
- Drumpf Pootin Winnie the Pooh
- Song lyrics
- “I also choose this guy’s ____.”
- Mom helps son masturbate “help me step bro I’m stuck”
It’s almost a guarantee any non-serious topic will devolve into one of the above topics and will go on for dozens of comments.
It’s particularly infuriating when you’re scrolling to get a source and it’s just those same jokes endlessly.
And it’s been this way for a decade!
Like watching a train pass by where every car looks the same.
Those are called unit trains and they mostly suck ass for the environment but are highly profitable for the railroads because they don’t have to do a lot of switching and are typically sent to just a few customers. Examples include coal trains and oil trains. Grain trains are kind of ok, but the coal and oil must stop.
First!
Good choice.
Firstposting is sacred and you will pry it from my cold dead hands
If anything, Reddit stole this from Slashdot. Slashdot probably stole it from Usenet.
Gotta get in on last posting. Sort by oldest and take the crown.
Making a comment shitty enough to kill an entire thread is a true game of champions
Isn’t that what PPB functionally does to specific comment chains?
last
[occupation] here, can confirm.
As a (disadvantaged group) I think (same disadvantaged group) is bad.
- Nothing you see on the internet is real. I mean this. Even if you have video of something, video and audio can be altered. Conversations can be edited to take things out of context. What especially is not real are comments by anonymous posters that are walls of text without any pictures, videos, or third party sources. R•dditors will gobble up anything they see. Absolutely nothing in whatever “Am I the parental legal relationship finance ask me about Bill Gates” subs are real. I hate they accept it as real. I hate they have hundreds of comments discussing these things that aren’t real. I hate how it creates feedback loops for reactionaries to post as evidence of something being real when it’s not. Pics related:
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Their humor is awful.
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Every sub is astroturfed or a government psyop, but they will pretend like their sub is not. Any fandom, hobby, or whatever niche will always have corporate stooges posting on behalf of the company. Any criticism of anything in those topics will be attacked with vitriol and real users will join the side of the stooges. Hall monitor getting buddy buddy with the campus cops energy.
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Their taste in art is awful. R•dditors will only go bazinga for paintings of attractive women, pop culture shit, and “realistic” art. Any abstract art or art with historical significance is frowned upon. Any experiments people do in niche communities are given contempt. The truth is, their taste is completely kitsch. Your aunt with Bettie Boop posters and Minions furniture has more artistic sense.
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Their taste in music is awful.
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They are deeply unserious about film. Yes, Requiem for a Dream is disturbing. No, it is not the most disturbing thing ever filmed. I’m not trying to be an edgelord. I just think Come and See, Antichrist, or Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer are all more messed up than two women sharing a double dildo. Also Quinton Tarantino is a hack.
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Referring to r•ddit outside of r•ddit. YouTube comments do not link to anything when you write “r/whoosh.” There was nothing to be gained by adding “r/” other than making yourself look like a dipshit. Nobody on Instagram understands your stupid fucking bacon whale joke or whatever the fuck.
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They are flat-out wrong about so much shit I cannot believe others believe what is being said. For example, they will make predictions on Pokémon cards for people to “invest” in and end up getting dunked on by Nintendo or whoever runs Pokémon right now. But nobody learns the site is full of shit and they will continue to lose money. Hint: collectibles have never been good investments.
That’s all I have for now. I do not go to that site. I’ve never had an account there. Occasionally in the past I’d stumble onto something from searching, but that was enough exposure to make me hate the site. Unfortunately, they have spread to other parts of the internet and exposed us all to brainworms.
A Serbian film was the most disturbing film for me. Not in a way that had me thinking for days like come and see and the other films you listed but in a “did this motherfucker really put that shit in there?”
I’ve never seen it and don’t want to. I know about the ending and whatnot, though. I think even putting it to film was more messed up than RFAD. A group of people wrote it up, showed it to other people, and they all decided “Yup! This is what we’re gonna spend thousands of dollars to film!”
Honestly the worst part about Requiem was the stuff with the older lady on dieting pills. You have to worry about elderly people isolated from the outside world plummeting into psychosis.
Thats a good point. The director making it from her POV while confused and scared was well done.
You have to worry about elderly people isolated from the outside world plummeting into psychosis.
How else are we gonna warehouse them?
The Human Rights Watch wrote a report on the use of chemical restraints amongst the elderly in the US. It concluded that antipsychotic drugs are sometimes used almost by default to control difficult-to-manage residents.[2] The FDA estimates 15,000 elderly individuals in nursing homes die each year due to the unnecessary use of anti-psychotics.
Nothing you see on the internet is real. I mean this. Even if you have video of something, video and audio can be altered. Conversations can be edited to take things out of context. What especially is not real are comments by anonymous posters that are walls of text without any pictures, videos, or third party sources. R•dditors will gobble up anything they see. Absolutely nothing in whatever “Am I the parental legal relationship finance ask me about Bill Gates” subs are real. I hate they accept it as real. I hate they have hundreds of comments discussing these things that aren’t real. I hate how it creates feedback loops for reactionaries to post as evidence of something being real when it’s not. Pics related:
People here legit had a struggle session over fake shit from that relationship advice subreddit.
A lot of people who post on reddit are kids. I was posting on reddit when I was 14 back in 2015.
A reference to something is not a joke. Monty Python et al isn’t funny outside of context.
Amber
I dream of a society where I would be gulliotined as a poster
Eh, I think in-jokes are pretty normal in most communities, and most in-jokes aren’t that funny, they just exist to strengthen a social fabric. The content of specific in-jokes can absolutely suck though.
UlyssesT calling out my Australian rise (apparently this is called a high rising terminal, or HRT, an acronym that would not be confusing on hexbo). I think it’s more of a “I’m not married to this sentence, please don’t kneecap me over it”, but 90% of Australian communication is either that or thinly veiled barbs asserting your social position.
UlyssesT calling out my Australian rise
I think if I heard such a thing being said by people in casual non-hostile conversation enough I’d be fine with it. I’m actually fine with “valley girl” talk as it was in CA, even, but when the fry was used for deliberate hostile condescension (more common in my old area than “valley girl” was), I learned to hate that.
Fry and HRT are different things, fry is the low register “croak” that is viewed as negative if girls and young women do it, but positive if older men do it.
HRT comes off as someone saying something but they’re not confident about it and are groping around for some sort of approval or backup (for better or worse)
fry is the low register “croak” that is viewed as negative if girls and young women do it, but positive if older men do it.
I hated it when older men did it at me, especially when I was toiling for minimum wage and they were venting their divorce dad frustrations at me.
I find it kind of attractive every which way, but also yes
90% of Australian communication is either that or thinly veiled barbs asserting your social position.
Some people reckon HRT (or AQI as below) is exactly that
But far from indicating insecurity, some studies suggest that the AQI is often used by powerful people when speaking to their subordinates (thereby explaining why Australians use it when talking to Britons). The theory is that it’s much more acceptable for a boss to ask an employee whether they understand something than vice versa. Linguists also believe the high-rising can serve other purposes. A rising intonation at the end of a statement (giving directions, for example) implicitly asks the listener to confirm that they understand what they’ve been told. Alternatively, it can be used to stop an anticipated interruption.
That scans
obvs with all these language and culture things, nothing is one specific thing
90% of Australian communication is either that or thinly veiled barbs asserting your social position.
could we get some examples plz
So, here, there’s a constant jockeying for clout, you can watch a group of guys reinforce their social structure. An interaction might go like this:
Guy 1: I’m interested in topic X, it is new to me but I find it enriching and I hope you do too Guys 2-5: This is actually terrible, and you’re an idiot for thinking this might be good and that we’d enjoy it. And this happens almost constantly regardless of whether the group actually goes with topic X as an activity.
It’s an almost constant stream of belittlement and humiliation from all parties, regardless of whether there is any camaraderie or friendship. It is really exhausting, but I’ve noticed I’ve reflexively done it.
Thank you for the clear explanation, this is something I have observed too. Very antisocial culture especially amongst men.
I’m sure I could think of a specific example, but my brain is fried
Amber.
Song lyric comment chains fall under this category for me, too.
“shut up and take my money”
Just say you think the thing is cool and want to buy it
Citing any of these
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fallacies#Formal_fallacies
The ones that really make my eye really twitch are:
- Ad hominem fallacy
It’s not a formal debate and ad hominem isn’t some fancy Latin term for an insult. Imagine if someone’s response to being insulted was “You just insulted me!”; yes, you got insulted. Congrats on figuring that out all by yourself.
- No True Scotsman
This one comes up so damn often when a person establishes a definition. “You cannot be a pacifist and support the death penalty” kinda thing. It comes up most often in discussions about socialism/communism from the mouths of reactionaries. The NTS fallacy is inherently tautological by its definition; it must be something where the definition is used to dismiss evidence to the contrary. “No human being is taller than 3m” is not committing the NTS fallacy. If someone said “No human being is taller than 2.5m” and someone responded “But Robert Wadlow was over 2.7m” and the reply was “Well that means he wasn’t human” that is the NTS fallacy. Otherwise every definition ever, and in fact every word ever, would be guilty of the fallacy as every single one of those necessarily excludes something.
- Red Herring fallacy
This one comes up less often but it’s just as obnoxious. You aren’t having a formal debate and there is no explicit agreement about the bounds of the discussion. Anyone can bring anything up. If you don’t understand why something is irrelevant then that’s on you, you can ask. If something is completely irrelevant then you can just say “That’s irrelevant” or you can ignore it.
Remember that one kid who would kick a ball around with your group and they’d always try and rules lawyer someone being out of bounds when everyone else is like “Bruh. We’re just kicking a ball around for fun. There is no field, there are no painted lines, there is no umpire. Chill out.”? This has the same energy.
God I remember when I was 14 or something, this wasn’t on Reddit but I inexplicably became fascinated by pointing out fallacies. It did not take long before people told me I was being incredibly annoying, clearly not understanding what I was talking about, not contributing anything meaningful to any discussion, and just generally being a smartass making a fool of myself.
Ummm, ackshually, people are only bothered by enlightened intellectuals pointing out their logical fallacies because it sheds to light their flawed reasoning and makes people defensive about how dumb they are.
starting every post with “I mean, <statement>.”
I know what you mean, you don’t need to start every post with it! Just state your statement that you were already going to do.
You can Ctrl + F “I mean” in every reddit thread and come back with 50 results it’s so widespread and I hate it! Biggest pet peeve for me lol.
starting every post with "I mean, <statement>.
Fuck “um” as well, as intentional written-out prelude to some le profound epic dunk on the unwashed plebians.
And SUPER FUCK “_____ much?” even though that one’s mostly fallen out of style. I want to piss on its grave even if it’s dead.
I mean, UM much?
I mean, I do this all the time both in person and on the internet.
spoiler
Oh gosh i think i do this one good call out
Guilty as charged.
I do this. I’m sorry
I just remembered one more, and it may count as a hot take for some that like using it themselves, but “it’s almost as if…” prefixes to sentences are really fucking grating and reek of the same passive-aggressive condescension that the other mentioned Redditisms do.
I’m with you on this one. It’s intended as a sort of, “we all know this but don’t say it,” or similar, but always just comes off as condescending to me. Maybe because it’s so often applied to statements that are in fact known and acknowledged.
“Unpopular opinon”
I just remembered another because of your post: “Let’s face it/let’s be honest” used as magic words to transmute opinion into ironclad objective fact.
I think there’s some value in an “I’ll be honest,” as a signal that one is being forthright despite a potential cost, with a corresponding appeal to the listener to hear the speaker out. But yeah, when it’s an appeal to an imagined silent majority that shit is often not very good.
“it’s almost as if…”
This is Twitterbrain I think and drives me up the wall too, you’re not alone
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“It’s the internet. You are allowed to swear.”
I think people only say that though when people swear but censor their swearing i.e. “f*ck”, which, imo, is very silly to do, like, no more half measures, walter
I honestly don’t care when people censor their swears. Honestly I think it can add something to written text depending on the context. It’s like an exclamation point in the middle of a word.
What I cannot stand is people saying “it’s ok to swear in the internet”. No fucking shit. It’s also ok not to swear on the internet you f*cking baby.
I think it’s funny when someone censors a word that isn’t normally considered a swear for comedic effect, like “Fr*nch”.
That is quality, yes. Br***sh
that’s fuinny but it’s also way different than censoring a swear word because swearing is bad
I honestly don’t care when people censor their swears
that’s your opinion and I disagree because I do care because I think it’s dumb because I disrespect the entire notion of “swear words” as sacrosanct, inviolable constructs
I lost a job because I was swearing as an expression of my very human emotions of frustration and someone who was entirely unrelated to this, dozens of feet away, only overhearing these words, was so offended they reported me, and that is a culture I think must be erased from the earth (AND CENSORING SWEARS ONLINE IS A GATEWAY)
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Is this an American thing? I’ve never seen the level of concern about ‘swears’ or ‘cussing’
I assume it’s not a Br*tish thing
I’m British and I swear like a sailor. I just don’t care if someone chooses not to or chooses to use asterisks when they type it.
I think people only say that
I’ve seen it said, particularly on
, for like “screw” over “fuck” which seems just as petty as getting mad about “Happy Holidays” being said over “Merry Christmas.”
Beginning a post with “Eh,” means I can safely disregard whatever contrarian take to follow
I do that all the time at work when I hear a lib take.
“Kkkamala is gonna tax unrealized gains!!”
“Eh, she’s not gonna do it while also having a lower capital gains tax than Reagan, as well as wanting to build trump’s wall, she really is pushing the same policies trump was in 2016, they said he was a threat to democracy but she isn’t somehow?”
Then they start asking why I’m defending trump…
I’m fairly certain most people I work with think I’m a Trumper without me ever having mentioned him or ever saying anything about him in particular
