Just imagine yourself happy, simple as that!

Listen here, Jack. This ain’t Reddit. Back when I was on a modest vice president’s salary, I had to cook meth in the basement of the White House just to make ends meet. And even with the extra product I skimmed through 8 years of Obama’s presidency, I still had barely enough meth to stay awake through my own presidency later on.

I don’t care if you make $30,000 a year or $300,000 a year, we gotta stick up for each other. And occasionally cook meth together.

What about pleading the 2nd?

Just kind of realizing that this nursery rhyme is a ripoff of the Myth of Sisyphus, which is a way better story to tell children.

“Since I voted for Trump, nothing I do is illegal.”

It’s like the ignorant redneck version of “we president now.”