Everywhere you browse, people have such strong opinions about everything and are so toxic or extremely negative. You start playing a game, want to check the forums or something and most of the posts are people being mean to each other. You open social media to keep in touch with people that you’d like to maintain a certain level of contact and there’s always some people that are always complaining about every single thing.

I see myself more and more closing myself into a bubble which makes me appreciate Beehaw much more. I know I am guilty of being taken away by the toxicity and sometimes replying things I wouldn’t be proud of but since I joined Beehaw I see myself policing myself more and more focused on being better.

Just a quick rant, I currently started playing Baldur’s Gate 3 and I am honestly pissed off on the fact people can’t give feedback without being rude or “gamers” just shitting on developers because they are stans of another game. I wanted to be active on the forum and comment on bugs and such because I want the game to be better but it is so depressing reading people being awful so often.

Why are we so shitty to each other? I’m so tired.

Edit: Pardon me if I used weird terms or grammar errors, english isn’t my first language

Edit2: removed specifics

    • acastcandream@beehaw.orgEnglish
      231·
      1 year ago

      It’s not “tone policing” to point out vitriolic tone in a discussion about how people have a bad tone with each other. It’s directly relevant to the discussion. Their word/tone was rude while calling for people to be nice.

    • T (they/she)@beehaw.orgOPEnglish
      16·
      1 year ago

      I honestly started crying, but that’s just me being pathetic and a sponge to stuff people say on the internet :(

        • sparklepower@beehaw.orgEnglish
          19·
          1 year ago

          hey, just wanna jump in here to say i am proud of you both for having this honest conversation peacefully <3 really appreciate the thoughtfulness here

        • T (they/she)@beehaw.orgOPEnglish
          4·
          1 year ago

          It’s all right, I was just extremely vulnerable due to the amount of exposure (which caused me to write this post) so I just got caught of guard, but I did my best to not be defensive

          • acastcandream@beehaw.orgEnglish
            4·
            1 year ago

            Either way, I should be more aware of the person on the other side of the screen. I could’ve had a gentler approach - but I want to reassure you that I was strictly talking to you about word choice, I do not think you are a bad person or have bad ideas or something. 

      • Zoop@beehaw.orgEnglish
        5·
        1 year ago

        You are not pathetic! Having emotions about things and feeling your feelings is not pathetic.

        It’s definitely easier being on and participating on the internet when you have a ‘thicker skin’ and aren’t too much of a sponge emotionally, but I don’t think it should be that way. I’m sorry that it does tend to be that way. It sucks.

        Having feelings about people saying negative things about a post you made where you poured out your thoughts and feelings and opened yourself up is not pathetic. It would probably be beneficial to you (& to everyone, not just you) to try and not take stuff like these internet comments so personally and so hard, but I know that’s a lot easier said than done, and being this way is not a fault.

        I may be projecting, because I’m definitely this way, but it sounds like you may have a habit of being too hard on yourself? I know I do! I’m a bit of an emotional sponge like you described yourself as, too, so I totally get it. We both could benefit from giving ourselves some more grace and understanding, like I tend to do for others and I’m guessing you do, too, and trying not to be so hard on ourselves. It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you/us, though. It’s so easy to be this way, especially on the mean wild west that is the internet!

        I’m probably all over the place with this but I hope it all makes sense.

        Just to reiterate: you’re not pathetic. Feeling that way and being that way is not pathetic. You deserve to be treated with kindness and understanding, both from yourself and from others. Some of these commenters seem to be taking your post and comments without reading them in good faith…which not only isn’t cool, but Beehaw has rules/guidelines about doing our best to take people’s comments and arguments and stuff in good faith, darn it!

        What you were saying was perfectly clear to me and I totally get and understand where you’re coming from and what you’re getting at and I agree because I’ve seen the same thing.

        I hope this all makes sense. I can get a little rambly and all over the place, especially when I’m emotional, and seeing your comment saying how hurt you were and then also being so hard on yourself for it makes my heart hurt for you! I totally empathize and understand. If I can clarify anything, please feel free to let me know!

        You’re not pathetic and your feelings (in the comment and the post) are totally understandable and valid here. Please try to be more kind and positive to yourself, just like how in your post you were saying people should be less negative and more kind and positive on forums and internet stuff. You deserve kindness! I’m sending big internet hugs your way :)

        (My apologies again for this long, rambly, all over the place, novel of a comment, lol!)

        • T (they/she)@beehaw.orgOPEnglish
          4·
          1 year ago

          This was great, thank you! Yeah, I just wanted to vent a little bit because I was being really overwhelmed by toxic things when I just wanted to browse.

          I am extremely hard on myself, haha. This is one of the things I tried to work on during counseling so I have huge triggers with rejection and such (yup, it’s awful).

          I really appreciated your message, really! 🥺