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  • Cromalin [she/her]@hexbear.netMEnglish
    21·
    10 months ago

    i was in a group thing and we were all going around saying our names and i went first and didn’t give my pronouns, because i’m trying to be relatively stealth, i was wearing a skirt, and i have a very feminine name. literally everyone else gave their pronouns, so when i inevitably get clocked people are going to have to ask or guess, and the mostly cis crew are definitely gonna they me

    i guess i should be glad i live in an area where people do that but mostly i’m just anxious

    • material_delinquent@hexbear.netEnglish
      22·
      10 months ago

      I experience most of these things as purely performative - like it’s pretty easy to tell apart when people who never ask for pronouns ask me for pronouns and when people do it habitually. Obviously I think everybody should ask. I do shame people who ask me in an obnoxious way that makes me feel uncomfortable, like when they say “you can’t tell anymore nowadays” before asking