I keep avoiding the topic with myself. I would like to do HRT but I mainly spin the following reasons in my head for not doing it:

  • Muscle loss, I cant work out as often as I would like and it would be visible. I don’t feel secure without some muscle to seem intimidating so I can defend myself. I am rather visibly queer and already get harassed as is for that and wearing a mask. I dont know any self defense and having muscles at least deters some people.

  • I dont want to be dependent for my whole life on estrogen. Logically speaking I want it but I keep thinking in war scenarios, or travelling, or anything impredictable it would basically be near impossible to get and I dont want to depend on something I cannot obtain easily and cant control the circumstances

  • Where I live there are no trans friendly doctors and I do not trust myself with DIY dosages at all. I wouldnt trust the DIY source in the first place, and even then making sure I dont fuck up my own body is too big of a responsability. I likely have OCD and freaking out if I did the dosages correctly or some small random shit would not do me good. Would very much prefer doctors but impossible in my case.

Asides I would really like the changes mentally and physically. I am too hesitant to get into this without proper help from a doctor or such. I’ve been reading HRT materials for at least an year and I still find a lot of the chemistry things confusing and dosages.

  • XiaCobolt [undecided, she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
    7·
    3 days ago

    1. There’s Cis and trans women athletes (the latter a current target of reactionary response). Yes estrogen is not as advantageous to muscle growth but women/femmes can still be muscular.

    2. I’ve definitely thought of this myself. Estrogen vials from DIY can last 5 years and are quite small to have a supply that long. Stopping HRT is also not the end of the world. Menopause is Cis women basically running out of estrogen and it’s rough but they live. If there’s still a source of testosterone (no orchie) that is not going undo some estrogen changes like breast growth.

    3. Others in the thread can answer as to options based on geography. Some doses of estrogen injection are quite standard. Some of our foremothers thousands of years ago were eating cheese made with fermented pregnant mare’s piss and chewing black cohosh and just kind of winging it for their whole lives. A couple of years of winging with the modern estrogen might be fine.

    • Aliyu [she/her, they/them]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      4·
      3 days ago
      1. Yea I know, fair enough
      2. I thought you had to change them almost monthly cause they get “cored”?
      3. Would actually be interested in reading more about this

      Thankyou!

      • awth13 [fae/faer, comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
        3·
        3 days ago

        I thought you had to change them almost monthly cause they get “cored”?

        That’s what the “official” sources will tell you but it’s just wasting vials. With proper care and safety checks (checking for discoloration as XiaCobolt said and any suspended particles), people are using vials safely for at least more than a year. That includes me, I do that. I used to fear DIY sources and DIY in general but, being in the same position as you – i.e., with no access to adequate healthcare – eventually jumped the gun and it was the best decision in my life.

        What made me finally choose DIY is partially the realisation that “official” doctors don’t know shit about trans experiences, commonly prescribe harmful or ineffective regimens – both happened to me in the past – and mostly just don’t care about us more than for a curiosity.

      • XiaCobolt [undecided, she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
        1·
        3 days ago

        I thought you had to change them almost monthly cause they get “cored”?

        Oh I meant an unopened vial can sit on a shelf for 5 years and doesn’t take up much room, if people can afford to plan that far in advance. “Coring” is real but also kind of overblown, there’s techniques and equipment to reduce the chances, the more concerning thing is discoloration etc that suggests containments have entered or the vial has gone bad. I don’t do DIY HRT but have investigated it a bunch in case things turn sour here in Australia.

        Would actually be interested in reading more about this

        Trans people throughout history have come up with ways to have gender affirming care. One particular group are the Enarei from ancient Scythia, who were feminised Priestesses assigned male at birth. It’s speculated they would consume Licorice and Black Coshosh, herbs that have anti-androgenic effects (post-menopausal women take black cohosh even now as a supplements). Pregnant mare’s have large amounts of estrogen in their urine. One of the first modern HRT medications was Premarin derived from Mare’s piss. The concentrations were still quite low, so they would be fermented sometimes into beer, sometimes into cheese.

        Edit: Sorry the wikipedia sucks because they don’t mention all the HRT stuff, I’ll try to remember a good source, but that’s the name for example of a group to look into.