I keep avoiding the topic with myself. I would like to do HRT but I mainly spin the following reasons in my head for not doing it:

  • Muscle loss, I cant work out as often as I would like and it would be visible. I don’t feel secure without some muscle to seem intimidating so I can defend myself. I am rather visibly queer and already get harassed as is for that and wearing a mask. I dont know any self defense and having muscles at least deters some people.

  • I dont want to be dependent for my whole life on estrogen. Logically speaking I want it but I keep thinking in war scenarios, or travelling, or anything impredictable it would basically be near impossible to get and I dont want to depend on something I cannot obtain easily and cant control the circumstances

  • Where I live there are no trans friendly doctors and I do not trust myself with DIY dosages at all. I wouldnt trust the DIY source in the first place, and even then making sure I dont fuck up my own body is too big of a responsability. I likely have OCD and freaking out if I did the dosages correctly or some small random shit would not do me good. Would very much prefer doctors but impossible in my case.

Asides I would really like the changes mentally and physically. I am too hesitant to get into this without proper help from a doctor or such. I’ve been reading HRT materials for at least an year and I still find a lot of the chemistry things confusing and dosages.

  • junebug2 [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
    6·
    3 days ago

    You don’t necessarily need to see a doctor in order to a get help from a clinician and a prescription. Informed consent clinics could help you. Erin has an article with a map here. It’s USAmerican-centric, but it has some international spread. i can’t personally speak to all of your concerns, but i think the estrogen dependence thing might not be as bad you think? Sorry if that sounds rude. People start and stop HRT all the time, often for financial reasons. It’s not ideal, but it’s not, like, bad for you. Physical changes do reverse when you stop, but i would say the mental benefits of taking it whenever you can are worth it.

    • Aliyu [she/her, they/them]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      3·
      3 days ago

      I am not in the west and there are no informed consent clinics, thank you for trying though

      Fair enough regarding stopping/starting HRT. Always had a fear of “damaging” myself which is why I am avoidant of DIY cause like I mentioned I do not trust myself lol

      Thanku!