• Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        Which time?

        Edit: oh dammit. I now see someone else already made this joke. Ok, to make it up to you, I’ll tell a different joke.

        So a woman in her Chicago high rise apartment was beating a rug with a broom on her balcony. Suddenly a big burst of wind blew her over the railing.

        Now she’s falling from the 30th floor.

        A man on the 25th floor sees this, catches her, and says “Wow, it must be my lucky day! A beautiful woman falls out of the sky and into my arms! Tell me young miss, do you suck dick?”

        Outraged by this she screams “NO I DON’T SUCK DICK!!!”

        So he drops her.

        A man on the 20th floor sees her falling, and catches her. He says: Wow, it must be my lucky day! A beautiful woman falls out of the sky and into my arms! Tell me young miss, would you be willing to fuck me?"

        Insulted by the idea she screams “NO I DON’T FUCK STRANGERS!!!”

        So he drops her.

        As she’s falling, she realizes she’s going to die, and in her final moments she prays. “Please god, just let ONE more person catch me! I promise to do any revolting thing they ask!”

        And on the 15th floor, a woman catches her. Before her rescuer can say a word, the woman screams “I SUCK! I FUCK! I’LL DO ANYTHING YOU WANT!!!”

        Revolted by this, the woman holding her says “Slut!”

        And drops her.

    • kmartburrito@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      His plan will be to “give Putin everything he wants”

      And then he’ll be like “aren’t I the greatest negotiator?!?”