this and more vicious self-owns, only in this incredible grass-toucher post (again)
I used to have irl friends but they all turned out to be horrible people or libs or whatever, I used to have leddit but leddit is fucking poisonous, I used to have discord servers and shit but I tend to pass into and out of discord groups with worrying ease, also I cant stop saying “another kkkracka down” at grampa’s funeral
now I have bear website and it’s the place I want to talk, what the fuck else even is there? where else would even tolerate me? any attempt to reach out and join communities or groups anywhere would probably result in critical psychic damage, also I still will not go into the queer center in town, what the fuck
bear website is the only spot where talking to people has a decent chance of not being a painful affair
hexagonal ursine webzone
This assumes you’d be treated with basic respect, which over time I have not. I have had people actively ignore me in person to the point of me sitting on my own in a crowd being actively ignored by several people etc.
Literally the meme where the person at the party is on their own in the corner is what I’ve been personally treated like when I have been in that kind of situation… Along with using various means of softening the experience (drugs/alcohol) and it’s never a good idea… I’ve also been around some of the most toxic people and a far more hostile environment that many here would be accustomed to. But I’ve had that experience of putting myself out there but a lot of the time it’s never worth it and I’ve regretted a lot personally…
That’s very true… and I can see how if you don’t have people to introduce you to the right parties and clubs it can be hard to find them. But there are so many people who just love the music, and want to share that with others, and just groove and feel good together.
You just gotta find the right crowd, the people who are there for the love of music. Not the ones who are there (just) to be cool, to gain status points etc.
But there are many many places and parties that are good and people really do it for the love of the music and the culture. It might depend a lot on the city, thinking better, but yeah…
I grew up in Ireland and I’ve always looked queer, so it made me a target… a lot of places you’d have to constantly be on your guard for instance and I’ve seen people get glassed because someone turned nasty on drink/drugs… so it’s hard to feel comfortable even now years later.
I get that… I think I was lucky that my hometown had a bunch of alternative parties and clubs, that had drag parties, hyperpop parties etc. besides also being one of the hotspots of electronic music in my country. It was easy to find a party where people were respectful and welcoming.
I AM realizing more and more that many cities are just shit when it comes to nightlife…