Or, as we call it, “prostitution”. Except instead of a teenth of crack and $5, the president is available for a meme coin.

Afterwards, get yourself checked.

Does the shadow in the belly button match the shadow cast by the hand? Does he have an “outie”? Caveat: I’m not a Photoshop sleuth

Trump administration photoshop in 3, 2, 1…

That looks like one of those comic villain moves. “Am I in Brussels, Inspector? Or am I perhaps… over here?? Hahahahahaha!”

That’s going to cost quite a bit, what with tariffs on electronics and all. Wait, I had a tissue around here somewhere…

So if Trump had put a gun to someone’s head, pulled back the hammer, then said, “Nah…”, you would expect that person to step up to a microphone and tearfully declare that “I’m alive today thanks to President Trump”…?

So what I’m hearing is if he did a brain implant, you would end up butt dead? Because there are a lot of people who could use a brain implant and who cares about their butts.

And let’s not forget, Trump Steaks, wine, airline, the New Jersey Generals, Trump University… the list goes on.

Has he even paid back all the cities he’s stiffed during his campaign?

Yeah.

Other countries have smallpox. America has bigpox. The biggest. Everyone says so.

Soon to be corrected. As the USA’s population seeks asylum, the per capita pollution will naturally be less. Two problems solved.

tl;dr: Is this meant to normalize higher egg prices?

If you really want to pass this bill, point out how their little hands can easily reach under lawn mowers to remove debris.

It’s a dick move to make fun of the mentally feeble, but god damn. Does his wife have to tell him, “Careful, that soup is hot” at every meal?

Edit:

Although:

“Ow! Pokey! Ow! Pokey! Ow! Pokey!”

“Mrs Vance, what’s going on?”

“Oh, JD’s in the bathroom applying his eye liner.”

I like this guy. However, that “Greenland is also a part of NATO” is much too subtle for the Mango Mussolini.

Called it.

Friday March 7th: So let me guess. Coming on the heels of, “Elon Musk should check Fort Knox to see if the gold is really there”, the next step would be a 1:1 “trade” of bitcoin for actual, tangible gold - which will be hidden away in a certain Mar-a-Lago basement. Remember you read it here first.

Fun fact: Every month something else falls off these things, or they find out a spring shower disables the electrical system, or…

Doc doesn’t have to get it to 88mph to travel Back to the Dealership

While this is a tragic death, I wonder if the parents would have reacted differently if a son had died?

Actually, that would be funny as hell - have the ICC issue an arrest warrant for Trump same as Netanyahu! Wouldn’t do much but it’s great optics. Can’t go to certain countries because he’s a Level 34 Felon, can’t go to the others because jail.

“What are you doing turning into this car wash? The cops are right on our tail! " " Yeah, but the cops are looking for a dirty car, right?” " Boss, you’re a genius! "

Waste of their time. Wasn’t it Trump who got the Supreme Court to declare that anything a sitting president does is pretty much legal?